Mommy Dearest
by loveconquersallxxx
Summary: What would happen if Lisbon's mother were alive? *a hint of Jane/Lisbon thrown in*


Lisbon was pinned to the floor. He was trying to make her stop fighting back by pinning down her arms and crushing her torso with his body weight. She discovered that the best way to get him off of her was to kick him where the sun doesn't shine. So, Lisbon kicked him, he grabbed himself and rolled over onto his back because the pain was that excruciating.

When she saw his face she knew she had really given him a good kick and she smiled to herself. She knew that she worn the steel-toed woman's boots for a reason today and she was happy she made such a choice. Instead of letting the creep get some relief she pushed him onto his stomach and handcuffed him.

She said with a fierce tone in her voice, "Jamar Welling, you are under arrest for the murder of Allison Greenwald! You have the right to remain silen- _Cho_!"

"Boss!" Cho yelled back.

"Cho, read him his rights and take him into custody. I am going to go and change, my slacks now have a hole from rolling around on the concrete with this guy," explained Lisbon, but before she left she asked, "Where's Jane?"

"Boss, he's in the car, he didn't want to come out and see the action. He said that he had no use in this part so he'd wait," explained Cho.

"Thank goodness," she sighed and walked away. She got her spare set of pants out of the trunk, while checking on Jane, making sure that he was where he said he was.

For once, to her relief, he was actually just sleeping in the backseat. He was calm and not annoying her at all, it was nice. What was even better is that, if he really was asleep, he won't ever know that she had to change her pants. Not that that was embarrassing to her, she just didn't want him to make inappropriate comments while with the team or just in her office for that matter.

She closed the trunk and wandered over to the nearest gas station, found the public bathroom and changed rather quickly. She ran back to her team who was putting Welling into the cop car, while two local officers took him to custody.

She gave Cho the keys and she said, "You drive. I'm too worn out to make it back." Rigsby and Van Pelt hopped into the back seat, next to each other so that way they wouldn't disturb Jane while he was sleeping.

It was a quiet ride; well, it was until they all got back to the HQ. Jane woke up with a burst of energy and started to whine that he had missed the ride back and asking why no one woke him up.

Lisbon told him to suck it up and to get back to what he was doing, sleeping. She said, "You know Jane, it was nice and quiet when you were sleeping. There was no nonsense or foolishness; it was just a nice ride. Cathartic even. I rather enjoyed it, but then this terrible thing happened. You woke up! What a shame it was to know that I would actually have to hear your voice and deal with your quackery. It's too bad really. I was having such a _nice day_!"

"Now Lisbon," Jane started to say, but before he could even finish she slammed the office door in his face.

What he didn't know, however, was that she was standing right behind the door listening to see if he was trying to pick the lock. Instead she heard footsteps walking away from the door and she knew she was safe, for now. He must of gotten the message that she didn't want to hear it so he decided to let her cool off.

Instead of jumping into the massive amounts of paperwork that she had, she decided to rest on her couch. She felt she deserved a five-minute rest; after all, she just tackled down a murderer.

Before she could even enjoy that rest that was well deserved, her office phone rang. She thought, _"It must be the A.G. calling about Welling." _

She got up to answer the phone and said, "Lisbon."

A woman talking a mile a minute screamed, "Teresa! Oh honey, how are you? I tried to call the San Francisco office, but they told me you had moved to Sacramento and work here. They gave me your office number. I hope you don't mind!"

It was Lisbon's mother.

"Mom?" Lisbon asked.

"Yes honey, who did you think it was? The A.G.?"

"Oh no. Well actually, uh, yes. I guess, but anyway Mom, how are you?" Lisbon asked after the slight confusion from the random phone call. Lisbon loved her mother, she really did, it was just, well, they were complete and total opposites. Lisbon, as most knew, was all about the rules and structure, that's why she became a cop. She loved getting in on the action and she loved rules, more than most people knew. Her mother on the other hand only really liked shopping and clothes. She was a religious woman, like Lisbon, but that doesn't mean they had anything to talk about.

Although, personality wise they may have many differences, when it came to looks Lisbon's father, when he was alive, and brothers always said, _"You look more like Mom everyday."_

She found this to be a high compliment because her mother was extremely beautiful. Even though Lisbon got her green eyes from her father, she got her mother's body type and facial structure.

Even though they looked a like, they carried themselves a lot differently. Lisbon is always in a pair of black, gray, or tan slacks with a comfy cotton shirt and a nice, light overcoat. Her mother on the other hand, was very colorful. She loved floral and _pink_, a color that Lisbon dreaded, and all girl stuff. Lisbon was not very girl-y. She could not even remember the last time that she had worn a dress.

Lisbon thought about it, _"Prom?"_ She concluded that prom _was_ the last place she was ever caught dead in a dress. While all of this was going on in Lisbon's head, her mother continued to babble on about her _wonderful_ vacation in Bermuda. Lisbon could not care less, but she kept on repeating the same phrases whenever her mother was on the phone, "That's nice Mom, I hope you had a nice time." "How's Tommy?" and on and on the list went.

Until there was something that shocked Lisbon so much she almost fell over, "Sweetheart, what do you think about me visiting?"


End file.
